Few can argue against the idea that the invention of the microprocessor has forever altered the evolutionary path of mankind. With the exception of fire, no other discovery has so quickly and completely inserted itself into every aspect of our existence. Computes continue to change not only how we interact with our world, but the definition of what our world consists of. Our entire concept of what a thing is has been rewritten, and is continually altered based on technology improvements. In essence, computers have completely redefined what is, and what isn’t.
In 1986 my entire music collection consisted of tapes and records, their cases/sleeves, the shelves they were stacked on, as well as the space in my bedroom where the shelves were placed. This menagerie filled a gap roughly 3’ x 4’ x 1.5’ and weighed close to 150 lbs. With each new format released, my collection shrank in weight and required space without any decrease in content. Flash forward to now. My music collection is roughly 100,000 songs from several thousand albums. The strange part is, it doesn’t really exist in any physical form. Sure there are some ones and zeroes in a mostly non-existent place, riddled with electrons that make up the data of my music collection, but for the most part, my audio library doesn’t exist in any 3 dimensional sense. It doesn’t end there, several hundred books, most of my movies, 3 boxes of recipe cards, and nearly everything in my filing cabinet have vanished into thin air as well. Not to say that I can’t access them whenever I want, rather I no longer have to lift, store, or maintain them in a real sense.
In the future who knows what else will join my media in the unreal cyberreality it exists in today. Scientists constantly use digital copies of matter, DNA, and even the basic forces that allow us to exist in the first place to run simulations, or create electronic models. Who knows? In one hundred years or so, the digital realm may reclassify what life is in the first place, just as soon as we fix that global warming thing.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Literacy Memoir (Or how I learned to love the WORD.)
There are times when I truthfully believe that no person on this planet has ever loved reading as much as I do. There is no romance novel or date movie in existence that can ever accurately portray the love affair I have with the written word. During my childhood, either through my relatives’ influence or my first schoolteachers’ prompting, both reading and writing clicked with my juvenile brain in ways few other things have. I believe at times, I am so infatuated with literature I would marry it if I could: priest, honeymoon, and everything. This writing assignment is just the self-reflective vehicle I need to take a nostalgic trip to my early literary days.
I remember in the first grade, the Bookmobile would visit my school. The teacher would shepherd the whole class into the thing, so we could each borrow a book until its next visit. During one such trip, almost as if by magic, the books containing no pictures started to appeal to me. Compared to the other first graders, this was highly abnormal, but nevertheless tolerated. At least it was, until I dug into the large cache of pulp horror novels, and started reading the works of a Mr. Stephen King. Whether it was the subject matter of those stories, or the fact that I was reading at a higher level than some adults, I was strongly encouraged to read books more appropriate for my age. This turn of events only spurred me to consume even more books, with ever-increasing numbers of pages. I thank the literary gods that my parents had the sense to empower me with my own county library card, allowing me to read to my heart’s desire.
Little did I know, much like crack cocaine or ceramic clowns, reading is an addiction. I’m sure there are important moments in time that I was completely oblivious to, my nose buried in a book. Long past my one genre days, I devoured any and all print media that came across my path. Sadly, this horrible affliction continues to this day, though I have learned to balance my ‘disease’ with the saving graces of physical activity, and terrible take-out food. Jests aside, the act of reading has probably caused as much trouble as it has kept me out of. I believe during the sixth through ninth grades, I probably would have been less of a miscreant in the eyes of my teachers, if I had simply acquired several tattoos, and a smoking habit. By High School however, my reading endeavors had been curbed immensely by the joint distractions of organized sports, and the opposite sex (in no particular order.)
Following graduation, with little career or college prospects, I was all but forced into the Military by the powers that be. Not to say that enlisting was anything but a blessing; my hometown was too small to contain my ambitions anyway. It was during my service tenure that I not only rediscovered reading, but found other like minded soldiers with whom I could discuss books. The constant “hurry-up-and-wait” pace of training and deployment leaves many idle moments to enjoy a page here or there. Should you ever find yourself without written material to enjoy, the Department of Defense was more than happy to provide some of theirs. From the moment I stepped into the recruiter’s office, till my day of discharge, I can only speculate at the forest worth of pamphlets, reports, and bulletins I’d been inundated with.
After my promotion to Sergeant, I quickly came face-to-face with another aspect of literacy, one I had somehow shammed my way through during my prior school years. Of course I can only refer to the act of writing. As a NCO (Non-Commissioned Officer) I was expected to write and proofread hundreds of reviews and reports, on every aspect of my unit. I came to the sudden realization that I was not only a terrible writer, but I’d miss mistakes in reports more obvious than an 18-wheeler in an “expectant mothers only” parking space. Don’t get me wrong, any person with a pencil and half a brain could write the basic performance checks, and day to day activity reports that my branch seems to thrive on. Writing training outlines and other drafts, meant for the higher grade officers of the unit would all but leave me broken out in hives. I would literally draft something months in advance, edit it dozens of times, and stay up all night polishing it before submission, only to have it thrown back in my face for obvious punctuation errors, or clownish wording. It took me an eternity before I could whip out even a page with any sort of timeliness. I’m thankful for the volume and repetition of these reports, eventually with practice, I started getting them right.
Unfortunately, how the U.S. fighting forces writes, and how the rest of the world writes are two different things. Following my enlistment, I became a civilian contractor, hoping that my past experiences would somehow put me on a higher rung than others in the same field. I was shocked by the fact that very few “Military Support Personnel” have spent any time in the actual military. More surprising however, was the vernacular used in the writing of reports that accompanied any and every project with which I was involved. It was almost like my officemates had learned a completely different form of English than I had. Daily I would ask myself if this was truly how professionals wrote. Turns out it was. I have never felt more outclassed as my proposals were benched by better written ones time and time again. At this point, I had that gut feeling that only a proper education would get me where I thought I needed to be, writing wise.
Flash forward to today. Like many others, I’ve discovered that both the reading and writing level in this country have taken a turn for the deplorable. Who among us doesn’t receive some manner of alphabetic travesty in our e-mail inboxes daily? If the downfall of the English language is in our near future, then put me out to the pasture right now. I have no desire whatsoever to be part this trend, quite the opposite. I’m hoping that through college English courses, my writing will not only be understandable, but respected as well. Yet old apprehensions arise. Just to get to this point took me over three decades, how much longer will becoming a coherent writer take? Patience with my own shortcomings has never been a virtue I’ve held in quantity. Perhaps I’ll satisfy these questions by the time I receive my degree from whichever academic deems me capable enough to hold it without severely paper cutting myself. In the short term, I would like to know the real deal with that semicolon thing.
I remember in the first grade, the Bookmobile would visit my school. The teacher would shepherd the whole class into the thing, so we could each borrow a book until its next visit. During one such trip, almost as if by magic, the books containing no pictures started to appeal to me. Compared to the other first graders, this was highly abnormal, but nevertheless tolerated. At least it was, until I dug into the large cache of pulp horror novels, and started reading the works of a Mr. Stephen King. Whether it was the subject matter of those stories, or the fact that I was reading at a higher level than some adults, I was strongly encouraged to read books more appropriate for my age. This turn of events only spurred me to consume even more books, with ever-increasing numbers of pages. I thank the literary gods that my parents had the sense to empower me with my own county library card, allowing me to read to my heart’s desire.
Little did I know, much like crack cocaine or ceramic clowns, reading is an addiction. I’m sure there are important moments in time that I was completely oblivious to, my nose buried in a book. Long past my one genre days, I devoured any and all print media that came across my path. Sadly, this horrible affliction continues to this day, though I have learned to balance my ‘disease’ with the saving graces of physical activity, and terrible take-out food. Jests aside, the act of reading has probably caused as much trouble as it has kept me out of. I believe during the sixth through ninth grades, I probably would have been less of a miscreant in the eyes of my teachers, if I had simply acquired several tattoos, and a smoking habit. By High School however, my reading endeavors had been curbed immensely by the joint distractions of organized sports, and the opposite sex (in no particular order.)
Following graduation, with little career or college prospects, I was all but forced into the Military by the powers that be. Not to say that enlisting was anything but a blessing; my hometown was too small to contain my ambitions anyway. It was during my service tenure that I not only rediscovered reading, but found other like minded soldiers with whom I could discuss books. The constant “hurry-up-and-wait” pace of training and deployment leaves many idle moments to enjoy a page here or there. Should you ever find yourself without written material to enjoy, the Department of Defense was more than happy to provide some of theirs. From the moment I stepped into the recruiter’s office, till my day of discharge, I can only speculate at the forest worth of pamphlets, reports, and bulletins I’d been inundated with.
After my promotion to Sergeant, I quickly came face-to-face with another aspect of literacy, one I had somehow shammed my way through during my prior school years. Of course I can only refer to the act of writing. As a NCO (Non-Commissioned Officer) I was expected to write and proofread hundreds of reviews and reports, on every aspect of my unit. I came to the sudden realization that I was not only a terrible writer, but I’d miss mistakes in reports more obvious than an 18-wheeler in an “expectant mothers only” parking space. Don’t get me wrong, any person with a pencil and half a brain could write the basic performance checks, and day to day activity reports that my branch seems to thrive on. Writing training outlines and other drafts, meant for the higher grade officers of the unit would all but leave me broken out in hives. I would literally draft something months in advance, edit it dozens of times, and stay up all night polishing it before submission, only to have it thrown back in my face for obvious punctuation errors, or clownish wording. It took me an eternity before I could whip out even a page with any sort of timeliness. I’m thankful for the volume and repetition of these reports, eventually with practice, I started getting them right.
Unfortunately, how the U.S. fighting forces writes, and how the rest of the world writes are two different things. Following my enlistment, I became a civilian contractor, hoping that my past experiences would somehow put me on a higher rung than others in the same field. I was shocked by the fact that very few “Military Support Personnel” have spent any time in the actual military. More surprising however, was the vernacular used in the writing of reports that accompanied any and every project with which I was involved. It was almost like my officemates had learned a completely different form of English than I had. Daily I would ask myself if this was truly how professionals wrote. Turns out it was. I have never felt more outclassed as my proposals were benched by better written ones time and time again. At this point, I had that gut feeling that only a proper education would get me where I thought I needed to be, writing wise.
Flash forward to today. Like many others, I’ve discovered that both the reading and writing level in this country have taken a turn for the deplorable. Who among us doesn’t receive some manner of alphabetic travesty in our e-mail inboxes daily? If the downfall of the English language is in our near future, then put me out to the pasture right now. I have no desire whatsoever to be part this trend, quite the opposite. I’m hoping that through college English courses, my writing will not only be understandable, but respected as well. Yet old apprehensions arise. Just to get to this point took me over three decades, how much longer will becoming a coherent writer take? Patience with my own shortcomings has never been a virtue I’ve held in quantity. Perhaps I’ll satisfy these questions by the time I receive my degree from whichever academic deems me capable enough to hold it without severely paper cutting myself. In the short term, I would like to know the real deal with that semicolon thing.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
10 Albums you probably missed. (Or not.)
I understand music can be the touchiest of subjects. People are passionate about the sounds that they willingly subject their ears to, and often react to musical suggestions in much the same way Dracula would to the suggestion of a suntan. If you are uneasy about exposing your fragile auditory receptors to possible trauma, read no further. Compiled here are the 10 albums (for 2010!) that I think are most overlooked, or bypassed entirely.
Please, don’t crucify me for making the effort, my intentions are wholesome. Or not.
#10 - Ric Ocasek, Troublizing (1997
This is one of those albums that everyone knows a song or two, but NO ONE knows the artist or album. Both the singing voice of Noodle on Gorillaz debut, and one-half of the awesome that it Cibo Matto, Miho has already paid her musical dues in spades. In fact, nowadays, we owe her. If you remain unconvinced that this is a must have, youtube up the video for “Barracuda”. Besides, if a chick is into bugs, mean fish, and the karmic physics of the universe, you don’t question things. You just buy her albums.
It’s been said that prior, and during his albums with Weezer, their frontman Rivers has recorded nearly 800 tracks. That statement alone makes him not only a one-man musical army, but worthy of a double entry here as well. His wiki entry states that he had over 100 stock songs going into the recording of Weezer’s “Make Believe” alone. Imagine if for every album you recorded, you had to write 100 songs, and only keep the best 12 or so. The worldwide quality of music would increase exponentially. Lesser musicians would die from exhaustion, and only the truly devoted would remain. In such a kingdom, Mr. Cuomo would hold a post something akin to Pope. Between the two albums there are 37 tracks, I shudder to think how other tracks lie on the cutting room floor, post-edit.
Friday, May 29, 2009
Reverse Pheyden is my new GOD.
There are few motivational forces in the universe quite like nostalgia. The fond memories of things long gone can inspire people to create, plan, build, and above all dream. Seldom do any two individuals have quite the same experience with a given item or event from the distant past. Only by sharing our experiences does one truly realize just how much certain things matter in the grand scheme of things. Our childhood toys are probably the best reminders of this.
Remember your first Big Wheel? First Hotwheels Racing Track? Remember your very first He-Man vs. Skeletor backyard battle? Chances are your memories, while unique, are grounded in the very toys hundreds of thousands if not millions also had similar memories with. Me? I was always an action figure man. To this day I remember some of the epic Transformers vs. G.I. Joes vs. Lego Men vs. Star Wars guys 4-way battles for control of the entire known living room. Foremost in my action figure hierarchy were warlike little fellows that measured 3-5 inches. Star Wars, Joes, Micromen, X-men, and any other number of figures were the best. My compatriots and I hoarded, traded, and cherished them till the days when 40-hour workweeks and finals eclipsed our previously prized childhood treasures. Today I ask you to bear with me as I rave about one of the GREATEST finds a former action-dude aficionado could ever come across.
Called the GLYOS line of figures, they are the grassroots labor of love from Matt Doughty and Co. at Onell Design. In essence, Glyos figures are a series of stylish “Spacemen” that come in a myriad of colors, including transparent and glow-in-the dark parts. Roughly 3 inches tall, and built from injection molded PVC. They contain 13 articulated parts which all share the same pop-apart joint system, allowing for all manner of building customizations. The wiki article on Glyos describes them as “a cross between an action figure and a LEGO set.” There are 4 main characters in the line Pheyden, Exellis, Buildman, and the Crayboth, with more than a few limited releases, customs, and extras that the Onell crew regularly highlights on their blog. Each main figure costs a measly $8.00, a 2-pack of Crayboth will only set you back $6.00, cheap! The characters individual stories are open ended enough to allow any person with half an imagination to come up with all sorts of plots and happenstance for each of them. Apparently, that’s the way Matt likes it. For instance: Rebelling against his tyrannical creators in the Glyos System, Prototype Sincroid Exellis battles for the freedom of his mechanical brethren as leader of the Lost Sincroid Revolution. And: Hailing from the fabled Edge of Space in the mysterious Glyos System, Space Traveler Pheyden journeys through endless dimension securing the order of the infinite universe and patching holes in the fabric of time.
Though a latecomer to the Glyos thing, I became instantly enamored with both the product itself, and the ideals behind them. In this economy, any small business that can create such a high-quality, low-cost product for all the right reasons, and generate such nostalgia in all to whom they sell, deserves more than just our money. My first purchase included Reverse Pheyden, 2 Crayboth, and a three-figure set from the “Junkshop”, roughly 3 Glyos guys comprised of different colored parts from a myriad of other figures, chosen at random. To my surprise, included in my box was an additional Crayboth, as well as 2 Phase arm sets, an additional arm weapon for the Glyos figures. As awesome as the bonuses are, I am not alone in this regard. Matt and his wife Michelle are notorious for tossing in all manner of extras, including little notes of thanks. So impressed with every aspect of Glyos, I jumped back online and ordered Pyros Exellis, and Ballim Pheyden. Others have been stricken by the Glyos bug as well, making a small order, only to enjoy them so much that upwards to $300.00 was spent on a second! Shipping is extremely inexpensive, every order $10.00 or less costing $3.00 additional. I’ve been told by others that orders in the $100.00 range have cost less than $20.00 in shipping. I’ll take their word for it.
I simply cannot describe the euphoric wave of 80’s toy nostalgia I get every time I toss one of these guys in my pocket, before engaging in some task or other. Glyos have become little ‘life batteries’ to many, bringing joy in otherwise mundane or dreary situations. Don’t believe me? Head to the OctoberToys, and read it for yourself. The little guys are responsible for pulling people out of slumps, and generating friendship, and discussion. Heck, I almost wouldn’t be surprised, if scientists found they cured cancer. Can you tell I like these things yet? I suggest however, that you ignore any 4chan or forum hype you may have read about the Glyos system, and discover them in the same way I did; holding one in your hand. Go to the Onell store, buy an Arquem Pheyden, a Sentinel Exellis, and a Buildman of your choice and call me in the morning. Doctors Orders.
Eat if you can: Boiled Crab with OLD BAY seasoning.
Hear if you can: "Kitchen Fork" - Jack Conte
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
With the prospects for a (mostly) self-employed concrete finisher dwindling every day here in Bend, one often finds themselves looking into other venues as a means of survival. It’s no mystery that the construction market here is WAY down from where it previously rested, even four months ago. If you live here you don’t need me to tell you that. And if you work in construction here, then you too have seen the cobwebs on the bid wall at Bend Plan Center. I think it’s pretty safe to say it could get a lot worse; the previous month being probably the best indicator of things to come.
Thus my merry crew and I have broken into another realm: Paver Stones. Y’know, the pretty bricks that cobble the walkways and drives of some of the upper crust areas of Bend? I have to admit, that this time, the yuppies have got it right. Pavers LOOK GREAT, age in roughly the same fashion as concrete, and require less demolition to replace than a cement sidewalk. Cost wise, they’re a bit pricier per square foot, but you get what you pay for. I think paver stones are an option that anyone installing a small walk or drive needs to look at, as I can’t stress enough how good they look. The downside to these wonderful bricks is the time/labor of installing them. A large drive that could be completed in a day of concrete pours might take a week or more using pavers. (assuming a small crew on both.) The labor toll is heaver on the pavers as well, though you wouldn’t think it. While laying the mud down, and screeding it on a concrete pour might seem fairly labor-intense, it doesn’t hold a candle to pavers. Every aspect of laying paver stones involves hauling something, somewhere.
First the area has to be graded, (you move the ground around) then you lay your base material, (you move rocks around) followed by your compaction sand. (you move sand around) Finally, you lay out, and set the bricks. (yup, you move them around too) Afterward, you sweep in your mineral compound, (move it around) and spray the whole thing off. (I guess, you’re moving... water around?) Unless you hire a team of specially trained labor-monkeys, we’re talking tons and tons of moved material, per man. Not the best practice for people that love the long term health of their spines. Another closely related factor is the effort required to repair small mistakes along the way. Regarding concrete, any small mistakes can be cut/filled, and generally troweled out. Whereas with pavers, any mistakes that occur along the way can only be remedied by taking the misplaced material out, and replacing it. (again, moving things around) At no point, during any of the large building projects around Bend that I’ve been a part of, have I come home as dead dog tired as I did after one day of busing paver stones. It’s that rough.
Though I consider myself a better tradesman for having the knowledge of the paver process under my belt, it’s not something that I enjoy doing in the least. The inevitable fact that at some point, I’ll be laying the damn things gnaws at my psyche like a splinter working itself slowly under one of your fingernails. Each one I do gets a little bit easier mentally, but the physical beast that is pavers lies there, sleeping. Dreaming of when it will awake from it’s slumber, and wreak havoc upon the poor denizens of lower-backsville.
So if you’re considering using pavers in your next project, I don’t want to dissuade you from considering them as a valid option as they’re both practical and beautiful. But at some point during your decision making process, please, please, please -
Think of the spines.
Now Eating: Président Brie on some ol' grocery store baguette.
Now Listening To: "The Mosquito Song" - Queens of the Stone Age
Thus my merry crew and I have broken into another realm: Paver Stones. Y’know, the pretty bricks that cobble the walkways and drives of some of the upper crust areas of Bend? I have to admit, that this time, the yuppies have got it right. Pavers LOOK GREAT, age in roughly the same fashion as concrete, and require less demolition to replace than a cement sidewalk. Cost wise, they’re a bit pricier per square foot, but you get what you pay for. I think paver stones are an option that anyone installing a small walk or drive needs to look at, as I can’t stress enough how good they look. The downside to these wonderful bricks is the time/labor of installing them. A large drive that could be completed in a day of concrete pours might take a week or more using pavers. (assuming a small crew on both.) The labor toll is heaver on the pavers as well, though you wouldn’t think it. While laying the mud down, and screeding it on a concrete pour might seem fairly labor-intense, it doesn’t hold a candle to pavers. Every aspect of laying paver stones involves hauling something, somewhere.
First the area has to be graded, (you move the ground around) then you lay your base material, (you move rocks around) followed by your compaction sand. (you move sand around) Finally, you lay out, and set the bricks. (yup, you move them around too) Afterward, you sweep in your mineral compound, (move it around) and spray the whole thing off. (I guess, you’re moving... water around?) Unless you hire a team of specially trained labor-monkeys, we’re talking tons and tons of moved material, per man. Not the best practice for people that love the long term health of their spines. Another closely related factor is the effort required to repair small mistakes along the way. Regarding concrete, any small mistakes can be cut/filled, and generally troweled out. Whereas with pavers, any mistakes that occur along the way can only be remedied by taking the misplaced material out, and replacing it. (again, moving things around) At no point, during any of the large building projects around Bend that I’ve been a part of, have I come home as dead dog tired as I did after one day of busing paver stones. It’s that rough.
Though I consider myself a better tradesman for having the knowledge of the paver process under my belt, it’s not something that I enjoy doing in the least. The inevitable fact that at some point, I’ll be laying the damn things gnaws at my psyche like a splinter working itself slowly under one of your fingernails. Each one I do gets a little bit easier mentally, but the physical beast that is pavers lies there, sleeping. Dreaming of when it will awake from it’s slumber, and wreak havoc upon the poor denizens of lower-backsville.
So if you’re considering using pavers in your next project, I don’t want to dissuade you from considering them as a valid option as they’re both practical and beautiful. But at some point during your decision making process, please, please, please -
Think of the spines.
Now Eating: Président Brie on some ol' grocery store baguette.
Now Listening To: "The Mosquito Song" - Queens of the Stone Age
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Bubbles Pop - Thats just what they do.
Some of you quite feasibly, have been living in a cave for the last couple of years. This blog is definitely for you.
Monday, December 17, 2007
December Updates
Pay no attention to the fact that it seems like I'm dropping several posts a week in December, as I am merely posting things I drafted and never got around to publishing. If that weren't the case I'm quite sure nobody would care anyway as my total blog readership is like 1 or 2. Anyway, you have been warned.
NEW CONTENT UNLOCKED!
As a bonus I will jump on two bandwagons at once! I will not only be bothering you with a 'Now Listening To..' but a random food item review as well!
NEW CONTENT UNLOCKED!
As a bonus I will jump on two bandwagons at once! I will not only be bothering you with a 'Now Listening To..' but a random food item review as well!
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